Ma Vie En Rose

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles."
— Audrey Hepburn

This transition back into a "normal" life is, to say the least, interesting.  I've laughed (mostly at myself), cried (for good and bad reasons), ate (more than any normal person should), learned lessons (those really hard ones that make you question everything) and experienced what its like to be a 24-year-old girl living in Chicago.  I stopped blogging shortly before I left Senegal; I felt that it was something people did when they were traveling, to tell stories about the crazy adventures I live on a daily basis for my friends and family back home.  But then it dawned on me, I am still traveling!  Well, I guess I do have a lease and all that jazz, so technically I'm "settled," whatever that means.  But, this is just another chapter in my crazy life, I'm only in Chicago for a season and I am sure as hell not ready to settle down.  Yikes!


So here I am, living the dream in the big city.  Kind of.  Readjustment has proved to be a little trickier than I thought.  Audrey said it exactly right, "I believe in being strong even when everything seems to be going wrong."  Things feel a little out of balance right now, it hasn't turned out how I planned or expected my life to play out, but I think its okay for now.  I'm doing the whole job search thing, which is more frustrating that I could have ever imagined.  I'm not the same girl who left two years ago.  So instead of being okay with just taking whatever job comes my way because it pays the bills, I have this overwhelming desire to do something meaningful and make a difference in someones life.  Alas, I've turned down some jobs that yes would pay the bills, but seemed sketchy and just really made no difference to anyone but the ones writing the checks (and accepting them).  Or, for example, I got called for an interview with PlayBoy for a PR/editor position and was going to go.  But then I remembered that everything that I stand for, and that is important to me, would basically mean nothing if I worked for their company.  Or at least it would look that way.  So the question is, jeopardize everything I believe in for a job or have my bank account hate me.  Needless to say, I chose to live on a budget.  And what have we learned here?  Sarah has a soul... but needs a job badly Haha!

I was going for a run the other morning, yes in the frigid arctic tundra, and I realized that I don't ever want to have a typical 9-5 job!  Well 1. You cant go running on a Thursday at 1pm 2.  I would be bored to DEATH!  Someone shoot me in the face if I ever find myself living out the real life version of "Office Space."  No Lumburg, I will not finish the TPS reports.  Seriously, I think it would actually kill me.  I need something exciting, that will challenge me and make me feel like I'm doing something worth while.... anyone know of anything? eh, eh?  Kidding.

All of this said, I have the travel bug again.  A need for that globe trotting lifestyle and some kind of new adventure has certainly moved in. I've been back for 4 months and am already restless, that cant be a good sign.  Oh well.

But its late and I am sleepy, so until next time (probably tomorrow), I will be looking at my bottle of wine as half full and trying to figure out the world from the perspective of a little blonde American African, one day at a time.